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Month: March 2014

When A Dream Comes True, You Are Still You

Posted in Live From Intuition, Live Your Passions, and Self-Care and Self-Healing

I’m not much of a rebel.  In fact, I’m a pretty committed rule-follower and goody two-shoes.

Growing up in a world where I interpreted that approval came from what I did, not simply who I was, I fitted right in.  I did well at school, played sport, ran races, learned the flute, danced my heart out and made friends easily.

I rarely rocked the boat, broke a rule or even so much as dreamed of rebelling.  I played it safe and was a ‘good girl’ ’cause that’s what I thought brought me the love and security I craved.

And yeah, I was happy enough.  I certainly think I looked happy from the outside.  Busy can look happy because we are distracted from those inner whisperings that question whether we are truly serving our soul’s purpose.  Although I guess that’s what being young is all about:  Trying this, trying that, being active, working different jobs, studying, dropping out, changing track, starting and ending romances, getting married, getting divorced….Oh, well maybe that last bit’s not for everyone.

That’s just what I did.

Married at 23
Married at 23

Finding myself a newly separated woman shortly after our first anniversary was a bit of a shock.  My slightly more rebellious younger brother’s response was a classic: “Yay! Tricia’s finally done something naughty.” That made me laugh – a little anyway.

Yep, I’d walked out of a 15 month-old marriage and was not going back.  Goodbye good Tricia. Well, not really, I was still living the illusion that I could make my life work by keeping my head down and playing life safe.  Any minor transgressions along the way were simply not me, couldn’t possibly be me.

So although I felt guilty as anything over the marriage breakdown and very sad too, I didn’t really know how to take responsibility for my actions and move forward without hating myself.  My moral compass was fluttering in all directions and it took me a year or two to regain some semblance of inner stability.

What really bugged my super-focused, efficiency-oriented mind was the time I had now wasted.  I was in my mid-twenties, doing a job not remotely connected to the seemingly useless Bachelor of Arts I had completed, I was divorced, had no assets, no savings, a new boyfriend in the same situation as me and was spending yet more time and potentially wasting more money (only thanks to Mum and Dad), on another university degree to what end?

In my grandly delusional dreams I was going  to be happily married, financially secure and at home with my first child by 25.  What on earth happened?

Anyway, it all actually worked out okay. That penniless boyfriend and I moved in together that same year, I finished my psychology degree and post grad. diploma and started a new career, we got married and finally in my early thirties I got the ‘happily married with financial security and two children’ dream.  And that’s when I began to finally work out how to be happy.

Motherhood, at last.
Motherhood, at last.

When we get everything we thought we needed to be happy and realise we still aren’t, that’s when real personal growth happens.  I’m in a similar situation again right now.  I have the life I dreamed of when my children were babies and guess what, I still need to learn that it’s not enough when I don’t love myself fully and value each present moment for what it offers.

So to finish this long story, I just want to say at a slightly wiser 43, dream your dreams, make them happen AND remember to spend time learning to love yourself just as you are right now and love just where you are right now.  It makes the ride much smoother. That’s all.  <3

 

So Much Change – Let It Go

Posted in Live From Intuition

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again; We are all being called, right now,  to cleanse, purify, shift old patterns and elevate our vibrational selves to new levels of love, serenity and BE-ing.

Do less, be more.

Be more what? I hear you say.

Be more YOU.

The YOU that is at peace with what IS, not what your ego-mind thinks ‘should be right now’, ‘should have been before’ or ‘should be in the future’.

When I ponder these concepts I usually find myself observing the many animals in my natural surroundings.  Here’s a magnificent osprey, just being an osprey,

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a ring-necked or ‘twenty-eight’ parrot just being a twenty-eight.

IMG_8441

We love them just as they are. We don’t expect them to suddenly start playing the piano, reciting poetry or change in any way at all.  We can accept a bird is a bird is a bird.

So how about us? Can you accept right now in this moment that you are who you are and that’s just perfect?

The proof I offer that this state of being is not only possible but is our only truly natural mode of existence, comes from being with my children when they were little and from my understanding of how people still living their traditional indigenous cultures seem to be.

Visualise with me a two-year old child: I see my child playing, resting, eating, sleeping, running, climbing, playing, cuddling, eating, sleeping, crying, playing, giggling, resting, eating, bathing, sleeping.

Imagine now the traditional indigenous person: I see them resting, bathing, gathering food, preparing fire and cooking food, eating, caring for children, resting, hunting, playing music and singing or dancing, resting, eating, talking, sitting, laughing, working to make something useful or beautiful, sitting, walking, being with family, eating, sleeping.

How does our prevailing idea of modern life fit with these alternative images? How does it compare?

I won’t list the daily tasks because I think you can already sense that it involves a heck of a lot more rushing around than our two year-old or indigenous fellow human. Much more striving, pushing, asserting, competing, fitting in, molding into, denying of the deeper self, suppressing of the emotions and of course the pace is much much faster. Not to mention the disconnection from nature and mother earth which has harmed the very life force that supports us.

What went wrong? What on this blessed earth led us to believe that productivity, wealth accumulation, achievement and competition to be the ‘best’ would make us feel happy and bring us contentment?

The energy of this strong wave of change and renewal many of us are now feeling is a reminder of ‘what’ we are, not who, what.  We are spiritual beings so much more connected to the osprey and the parrot than we are to our bank balances, investments, career achievements, celebrity culture, fear-based media programs, publications and governments.

We are unique energy signatures sending out invisible but felt signals that mirror how we really feel to all we come into contact with, including the plants, trees, rocks and animals but most especially, one another.

Work on your energy today. Meditate, be alone in nature, walk silently, rest, drink lots of water and play beautiful, uplifting music.  Go within your heart and know divine love dwells there.

Love is who (and what), you and all of us are. No more, no less. Isn’t that enough?

Assertiveness Minus Guilt

Posted in Heal Relationships, and Live From Intuition

I surprised myself the other day while being unapologetically assertive with another human being.

He don't care what you think of him. A naturally assertive being.
He don’t care what you think of him. A naturally assertive being.

A very nice and reasonable woman knocked on our front door last Saturday afternoon, seeking my family’s participation in a national health survey being conducted on behalf of our federal government by a reputable research company.

I was in the middle of doing some tinkering with my Natural Therapy Pages webpage, a little facebooking and other mind-absorbing stuff.  My husband was dozing on the bed upstairs and the kids were staring at a game on our son’s new game console thingo.  It was plainly an inconvenient moment for a stranger to walk into our home and administer a survey.

I said no.

Knowing full well she had been knocking on doors along many a street in our town and reaping few participants since many of our neighbours are occasional weekend visitors rather than residents.

I said no.

Even realising we fitted perfectly the qualifying criteria for the age and gender of people she was required to interview,

I said no.

She asked why.  I just said, “it’s not convenient.”  The look of desperation in her face troubled me for a moment (it was a hot day), as she said; “I can come back another day.”

I still said; “no thanks, we’ll decline.”

As she reluctantly turned away from our front door and I closed it in her wake, I did feel a little uncomfortable.

I wasn’t rude and yet I was very unlike myself from days of old when I would have probably said yes, irritating my own family and compromising my own wishes in order to be “nice”.  Or, saying a very conflicted and apologetic no and feeling guilty about it for days after.

I didn’t even say sorry.

I spoke to my husband about it soon after and found I actually felt pretty comfortable with how I’d handled this refusal to be of assistance.

You see these days I’m much more comfortable in my own skin than ever before, I don’t feel the strong need I used to have for approval from others and as a result of my ever-present well developed intuition, I know without hesitation what will serve my highest good and what will not.

What also became really clear to me from this little experience was how far I have come from the Tricia of ten years ago.  Back then, not only would I have agreed to participate in the survey (regardless of personal inconvenience), I would have seen it as a highly valuable exercise in information gathering and dissemination of information to the masses for their certain betterment.  I would have felt proud to add my opinions, data and vital details, so that others may come to informed inferences, correlations and conclusions.

Nowadays I feel so inexplicably separate from the bureaucracies that administer our public health policies, campaigns and services, that to take part in a process, that to my mind is a colossal waste of money becomes a no-brainer. It’s very simple,

NO.

This is not to say I have any great criticism against our public health system in general, I just think research that results in public health campaigns to entice individuals making unhealthy choices to change their behaviour gets patchy results at best, and smacks of feel-good brownie points being scored by the political party in power.

So there.

Wow! Where did that come from?  Didn’t think I had a strong political view anywhere in my oh-so spiritually-aware self.

Hmmph. Still a normal person then? Yep that’s correct. Just happier being me these days.

 

 

 

Settling Into What’s True

Posted in Live From Intuition, and Trust The Universe

What once was hidden is now revealed.

So much has come to the surface to be sorted, reviewed, re-filed and re-leased.

The planetary influences of Mercury in retrograde during February along with Venus being absent from our night sky for around six weeks has supported much soul-searching, truth-seeing and bulls**t-dumping for us all.

The new moon on Friday saw many of us reach a culmination or end-of-process point where clarity was achieved and the pathway forward was revealed. Well, not so much revealed in full, but your next step may have been hinted at. And in the early hours of Thursday morning, Venus rose triumphantly in the east, righting our sense of balance around love and money.

There was a very strong quality of metaphorical death and re-birth around this particular new moon.  I felt it intensely all last week.  How did you fare?

The pace of change on offer may be feeling kind of hard to keep up with, particularly when ‘normal’ life must go on.  Although, seeing this pretty sunset last night while dinner preparations were underway, was a lovely moment of flow for me.  I saw the clouds forming before the sun dipped below the trees and I said: “It’s going to be a lovely sunset tonight.”

A few moments later I left the salad beginnings on the chopping board and went outside on the balcony to take a look.

last night's sunset take one...
last night’s sunset take one…

About ten minutes later while standing at the kitchen sink washing some dishes I saw that the sunset had changed from golden orange to hot pink and rushed outside to capture it.

sunset take two
sunset take two

This simple sunset got me thinking.  Change is occurring all around us in our natural world in every moment of every day and yet we often resist change when it happens in a human-shaped way.

Trees grow, leaves go brown and fall from the branch, insects hatch, a kookaburra – in view of my desk – swoops to the ground to snare a lizard, a kangaroo hit by a car lies dead on the roadside.  Life, death, birth, ageing, illness, decay, pro-creation, it’s all happening all the time, right under our noses.

What’s true for me now, more than ever before, is that my ability to deceive myself about what actually matters in my life, what is working, what is good, what could be better and how much I am responsible for creating my reality, has dropped away and died.  That’s a good thing because to live in illusion or is it delusion, about one’s life is to miss out on being present and aware of the life happening all around us and within us as well.

The sunset of last night has passed and will never be again.  I’m glad that I paused to take it in and say “Aaah”.

If you want to see a thing of beauty, get up early tomorrow morning, around 5.00am.  Look to the east and witness the beauty of bright sparkly Venus rising to shine briefly before being upstaged by the sun just an hour or so later. A little miracle of life to be enjoyed and savoured.

Namaste